i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
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