your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
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