and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
Thank you for holding my vodka while the police let me ride their horse.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
Randomize
