is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
