Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Randomize
