The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
Emergency. I brought a boy home and we fell asleep, but I just woke up to him peeing against my bedroom wall. So I brought him to the bathroom but he fell over and he's sleeping in the tub. Can I leave him there? Because that's what I've done.
Better the hardwood than the carpet, right?
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