OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
