we have officially lost it.
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
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