Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
Randomize
