don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
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