I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
It all started with a game of naked twister.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Randomize
