We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
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