the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
Hey had an urgent voicemail from the Illinois national guard....have you been using my identity for your blackout weekend?
Yes and yes
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
Randomize
