ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
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