I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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