last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
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