he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
Randomize