Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
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