Don't make out with my wife yet
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
I got a black eye last night. This guy said for every 35 pounds you lose you gain an inch to your dick. I asked him how long he has been peeing sitting down.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
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