gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
Randomize
