so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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