Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
Randomize
