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• (770): View more from Georgia

  I got us kicked out of the bar because the waitress found me in the kitchen trying to make spaghetti

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• (386): View more from Florida

  No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.

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• (360): View more from Washington

  just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.

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• (757): View more from Virginia

  If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...

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• 

  21 People Tragically Stumbled Upon A Dead Body

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• (863): View more from Florida

  And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard

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• (973): View more from New Jersey

  So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it

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• (732): View more from New Jersey

  shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples

  (1-732): View more from New Jersey

  you dont

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  i dont

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• (910): View more from North Carolina

  I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?

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• (720): View more from Colorado

  I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again

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  27 Socially Expected Things That Are The Absolute Worst

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• (516): View more from New York

  I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me

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• (202): View more from Washington, DC

  She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.

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• (916): View more from California

  Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.

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• (270): View more from Kentucky

  The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life

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• (260): View more from Indiana

  My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.

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• (816): View more from Missouri

  Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.

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