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Whod you bang
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
I woke up to the sound of gentle rain, only to realize I was laying under a urine trough in the men's restroom. Fuck you, bourbon. Fuck you.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
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