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• (206): View more from Washington

  This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.

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• (440): View more from Ohio

  eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(

  (1-440): View more from Ohio

  just blow him with soup in your mouth.

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• (904): View more from Florida

  the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants

  Fav 7 6221 963

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• (815): View more from Illinois

  Ran into that hot funeral director in the bar two days after the wake. pretty sure we drunk made out.

  (815): View more from Illinois

  Grandpa would have been proud

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  19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive

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• (317): View more from Indiana

  What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?

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• (214): View more from Texas

  You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp

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• (810): View more from Michigan

  RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.

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• (480): View more from Arizona

  It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.

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• (971): View more from Oregon

  I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity

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  25 People Confess What They’re Shamefully Attracted To

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• (714): View more from California

  You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.

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• (205): View more from Alabama

  I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.

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• (336): View more from North Carolina

  dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!

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• (775): View more from Nevada

  He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.

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• (818): View more from California

  Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"

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• (440): View more from Ohio

  So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.

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