Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
Randomize
