So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
Randomize
