and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Randomize
