she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Randomize
