Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
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