butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
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