You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
Those nachos came to me in a dream
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
Randomize
