Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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