I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
Randomize
