I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
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