Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
Just wrote the directions to get to the girls house im hooking up with on the back of my marriage certificate. Officially worst husband ever.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
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