Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
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