Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
I hear youre working today. To keep you entertained, ive compiled a list of condiments that my dick has NOT been slathered in since last Friday: Relish, and raspberry jam. That's right.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
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