R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
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