New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Randomize