Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
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