ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
even my farts smell like vagina
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
Randomize
