And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
What a fucking waste of an outfit
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
