Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
Randomize