The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
Just reduced mom to tears when she realized I wasn't kidding about hating kids. She's crying about never being a gma. Now would be the time to tell her about the girl you knocked up. You're welcome.
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Randomize
