I may or may not have eaten the rest of your birthday cake last night after getting blazed and watching harry potter.
i think you have the wrong number
so then it wasn't your birthday cake. k, cool.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
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