capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
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