I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Randomize
