I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
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