Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
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