So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
