Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize
